Harmony At Last, LLC

Have you ever been in the midst of a big change and felt scared to take the next step? Or maybe you are in this place right now?

During these times of change, the unknown seems so frightening. Self-doubt based in fear lurks in your thoughts. What if I fail? What if no one likes me? What if I really am not good at this? What if I can’t figure it out? What if I can’t balance this with my other responsibilities? What if, what if, what if…

These statements can keep you frozen in place. Not yet ready to move forward and uncomfortable in your current position. I call this discomfort “the wonderful seeds of change”. You see, in order to take the next step, this leap of faith, you must want something different than you have today. The seeds of change stirring inside you are the blossoming of the next phase of your journey.

You will know when you are ready to leap. All the pushing and prodding in the world by other people won’t make you do it (although in the best case, it may cause you to think and in the worse case, it may irritate you). The moment you leap is so freeing because you did it… you took the next step and were willing to turn with excitement to your future.

A brief visualization that was shared from a close friend…

Imagine that you had an empty glass jar in front of you. Fill the jar to the very top with golf balls until you can fit no more. Is the jar full? Now when you think that the jar of golf balls is full, pour pebbles into the jar and shake the jar gently until the pebbles fill all of the empty spaces between the golf balls. We now have a jar filled to the top with golf balls and pebbles. Just for fun, now add sand to the jar and slowly shake the jar until the sand fills all of the remaining spaces between the golf balls and pebbles.

This jar can be a representation of life. The golf balls are the most important things to you— this may be your passions, family, friends, and health. If only these important things remained in your life and everything else was lost, your life would still be full. The pebbles are other things that matter in your life— maybe for you this is your house and your car. The sand is the other stuff in your life— the small stuff. Hopefully you’ve noticed that if you fill the jar with the sand first, there will be no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. We can say the same thing about life. Our time and energy needs to be focused on those things that are most important to us.

Have you ever noticed that when a difficult situation is described, people will sometimes refer to the actions they took to get past the challenge in very strong terms? You may recall hearing comments such as “I pushed hard to get through it”, “I pushed back”, “It’s like hitting a brick wall”, and “It was a struggle but I stood tough”.

What thoughts and feelings do the words “push” and “hard” bring up for you? Do the thoughts of “pushing” reflect hard work, confrontation, worry, stress, fight, struggle, and unpleasant tasks?

What if it was possible to overcome a challenge without the need to push? Would you desire that path instead?

A quote from “the Te of Piglet” by Benjamin Hoff deserves some reflection. In the book, we are encouraged to watch water in a stream to learn about effortless action.

“When a stream comes to some stones in it’s path, it doesn’t struggle to remove them, or fight against them, or think about them. It just goes around them. And as it does, it sings. Water responds to What’s There with effortless action.”

What challenges are you facing right now that you want to get through? How have your actions been thus far? What changes can you make to incorporate effortless action to support your success?

I watched a worm today. Now, I must admit, that this is something I do not do everyday. I was enjoying a break in the rain with my son and we were outside admiring how we could see a little bit of grass again as the snow melted. I happened to notice a worm, moist and pink, slithering across my driveway. I pointed out the worm to my son and invited him to watch it with me. Together we watched the worm and discussed why it moved like that, what letter the word “worm” started with, and how we should be gentle to it and not step on it. This worm captivated our attention for a few brief moments.

So what did the worm teach us? In addition to the obvious life lessons of science, the alphabet, and gentleness, there was something bigger. Much bigger. We paused and we lived in the present. While I was watching the worm, I wasn’t thinking about making dinner, the phone calls I wanted to return, or the emails still waiting to be sent. And how beautiful that moment was because I truly lived it.

The Vermont Women’s Expo, an event designed to inform, enhance, and inspire will be held on Saturday, March 24th from 9am-5pm at the Sheraton Conference Center in Burlington. Harmony At Last is proud to be exhibiting at this event and leading a workshop from 11:00-11:45am. The workshop details are:

Papers, Papers, Everywhere—Transform Your Paper Piles from Chaos to Calm

Bills, invitations, advertisements, magazines, kid’s schoolwork, receipts… the incoming papers seem never-ending.
• Learn how to handle paper in a way that’s mindful to your lifestyle
• Gain useful tips that you can put into practice immediately
In this presentation and open discussion, participants are encouraged to bring specific questions about their paper organizing challenges.

We look forward to seeing you at the expo!

What is it that you really want to accomplish? When you close your eyes and visualize your dreams, what do you see? Often when we allow ourselves to dream, we enjoy blissful moments of our future success. Then, when we open up our eyes, we’re still faced with the same reality. It is at this moment that we may be tempted to put ourselves down and dismiss the dream… “That will never happen. Get real. I’m not good enough. I’m not smart enough. I can never earn enough money. I … (fill in the blank).”

I offer you another alternative. Don’t give up. If you believe in yourself and your dream, it will happen.

A favorite quote of mine that I want to share with you is below. Dare I admit that it’s from a Danielle Steel book. I can’t remember which one- I don’t really read her books much anymore (it was a definitely more of a teen and early 20 something phase for me).

Don’t give up your dreams or your dreaming. Don’t let life cut your line as you reel in those dreams… hold on tightly… keep reeling… don’t give up… grab that net… and if they look like they’re about to leap out of the net after you’ve caught ‘em, jump in after ‘em, and keep on swimming, till you drown if you have to… but don’t ever let go of those dreams!

Edward M. Hallowell, M.D. has written a great book called “Crazy Busy- Overstretched, Overbooked, and About to Snap”. In it, he describes two different mental/emotional states that we may find ourselves in, C-state and F-state.

“C-state is clear, calm, cool, collected, consistent, concentrated, convivial, careful, curious, creative, courteous, and coordinated. On the other hand, F-state fractures focus and is frenzied, feckless, flailing, fearful, forgetful, flustered, furious, fractious, feverish, and frantic. It can also drive one to utter the famous f-word. In C-state you have found your rhythm. In F-state you have lost it.”

Each of us can probably remember times in our life when we have been in F-state. It certainly doesn’t feel good and it is difficult for us to have much productivity or work / life balance at those time. We’re not at our highest points of success in this state.

C-state feels good. We’re really on top of the world with this feeling. We have so much positive energy that we can devote to our tasks at hand.

The question is, where do we spend most of our time, in C-state or F-state? What is the impact to our customers, family, and friends when we’re in F-state. If we’re in a position of leadership with others, what happens to our ability to lead when we’re in F-state? If our current situation leaves us more prone to F-state, what do we need to do to change it?